Embracing Life’s Messiness into New Growth: Insight from a Depth Therapist
Fall is finally here and after one of the hottest Texas summers on record, I want to be outside every minute I can. The call to get my hands dirty, to feel the earth between my fingers and under my nails so strong that digging in the dirt is what I found myself doing recently. With intention, I dug with bare hands, no gloves or a shovel! I simply couldn’t wait to get my hands dirty. Delightful it was, even though I was a bit messy when done – dirty hands, feet, knees and even my face and the tip of my nose. It felt a bit like bathing in the earth and it felt good.
Clearing a Space to Allow Room to Grow
Life, too, is messy. I love the word messy as it describes so well how we feel when we dig deep and do the work to navigate the complexities of life. When we take a deep dive into our souls with the hope of sparking new growth, deeper understanding of ourselves, or greater connection with others we can feel a little disoriented and quite messy. When we journey through the process of digging into who we really are it can feel a bit like being covered head to toe with damp and dark soil. The reward, though, is a clearing of space that allows room and an invitation for something new to take root within you.
I had a purpose of course, other than just getting dirty. My purpose was to clear out the dead, pull the weeds, and prepare for fall planting. With bare hands, as I pulled the dead growth, brown and brittle, some with ease and others stubborn and wanting to hold on for life, I began to reflect on the pieces of my life that felt worn out, tired, or even dead. What was I holding on to that was no longer serving me? What parts were just worn out and needed some love and attention? And, what had I already let go of but not noticed? Was there perhaps even new growth trying to reveal itself just as there were fresh green sprigs of monkey grass underneath the dead I carefully removed?
Letting Go of What No Longer Serves You
Truth be told, I was holding on to ideas, thoughts, and matters in my life that were absolutely not serving me anymore. I discovered several parts of me that were in need of differing levels of attention. Some parts only needing acknowledgment and others in need of some deep love and care that will take time to transform and heal (these are the messy parts). The parts that needed mere recognition were the parts where new growth had already taken root but was still outside my consciousness. Becoming aware of this new life inside of me and connecting with that numinous energy felt grounding.
Here I was in all my complexity, both messy and grounded, literally and figuratively, at the same time. A literal mess covered in dirt but with bare feet standing strong and firm on the earth beneath me. Standing there in that moment, I felt a welcome embrace of the recently discovered branches of life budding within and a tender love for that which felt messy and in need of tending.
Intentional Pauses in Life can Reconnect our Deepest Self
I love knowing two opposing emotions can be true at the same time. This tension speaks boldly to the beauty of the complexity of human nature. We can, in one present moment, feel both grounded and messy. This is how I found myself to be as I dared to take a deeper look within. While my messy parts were clamoring for care, the core of who I am was fully intact and in a state of growth and expansion. All I had to do to fully experience my deepest self and the myriad of parts within was to pause long enough to see the inside of me.
So, I took a moment to pause and breathe in the cool crisp air. Gazing up at the pristine blue sky, I gave honor to all the many parts within that are working to keep me safe, growing, healthy, grounded, and whole. It’s in these intentional pauses of life that we can reconnect with our deepest selves and integrate all our parts. And, oh how easy it is to forget when life takes over!
This is what psychotherapy can feel like. When you start the journey of therapy it can feel extremely disorienting. As you begin to peel back layers of defense and protection you can feel raw, exposed, and downright messy. But, it’s this peeling back of layers that helps you get to the core of who you are, the essence of your being. Peeling back the layers may reveal some of the tensions where opposing feelings, wants, and desires reside, but with an inquisitive spirit and support you can come to a greater understanding of what this all means for you.
Therapy provides a space of safety to connect with wisdom within
Therapy provides a space of safety for you to explore and connect with the great wisdom within. The secret is we all have it; we all have this wisdom within. It’s only a matter of tapping into it. This is where depth psychotherapy, while challenging, can also be fun. We may delve into some hard stuff but we will also let curiosity and hope guide the process. You might think of each weekly appointment as the pause you gift yourself to slow down and honor who you are, where you have been, and where you might go next. A deep dive into therapy can ignite connection and growth that expands the many parts of your life, just as weeding and pruning prepare the way for a fruitful and healthy garden.
Take Time to Pause, Prune, Connect with Nature and your Deepest Self
My moment of pause brought great joy. Connecting with the earth and my deepest self was exactly what I needed on that crisp fall day. Texas may bring more warm weather but I am thankful we are out of the summer heat for now. If you find yourself asking some of the deeper questions of life, meaning, or pondering your purpose then a deep dive into the soul may be calling you. I love to walk along the path with others who are on their journey of self-discovery.
Work with a Depth Therapist in Austin, Houston, and throughout Texas Today!
Keep in mind that your spiritual journey and exploration of existential questions are not just personal quests, they’re integral to your overall well-being. Research has shown the profound impact of depth therapy for individuals who seek clarity and meaning in their spiritual and existential pursuits.
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